Monday, September 15, 2008

Denial No More

Another birthday,... big deal. So what. What difference does it make,... really?

For years I have felt too young. Married early, started the family soon thereafter, always playing catch-up. I'm often the youngest among my friends. Never feeling quite old enough, or grown up enough. Perhaps "mature" is the word I'm reaching for here?

So when I get a call from the Doctor's office telling me that my cholesterol is elevated enough that they want me to start medication to bring it down, and my first reaction was, "No way!" I assumed it was because I know that my diet is decently healthy, I'm exercising as much as I can, and my genetics are against me.

Then it occurred to me. Deep in the recesses of my conscience I consider those who take medication for chronic, well... anything, must be... old.

Surely that's not lingering back there! Some kind of fear of aging? What's up with that?! I've always looked forward to growing up- and certainly don't feel as if I've arrived at that particular destination! Even if I have, I've anticipated it, longed for it, hoped and waited for it! I even stopped coloring my gray hair out of my delight in appearing- to strangers anyway- wise and mature. (worth a shot!) To be fearful in any way seems wrong somehow.

But now I am taking a medication designed to lower my cholesterol. Every night. The prescription will last for 6 months, at which time we'll check the old pipes again for buildup.

So I'm 42, I have a 22 year-old son followed by 4 other children, I'll soon have a son-in-law... Whether I act like it or not, whether I feel like it, I have arrived!


Sue Cohen said...

You are great! Love ya' Sue

Sharon Maiolie said...

OH, Barbaranne, I am right with you with this getting older thing. I don't like it either. Could it be because we are out of control? We can't control all that goes on in our bodies. But...we both know that GOD is always in control and knows what is going on in our bodies. That should be a comforting "but". Thanks for leading the Bible study. I'm sure it will help all of us daily.
To God Be The Glory, (even in these aging bodies)

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday!! Welcome to the 42 club!! You look great!! In fact you look alot like Kate in your picture!

Brenda (from FPC, now in GA!)

Nathaniel said...

You know what the answer to the "Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything" is?...

42! ^.^

psssst! new pics on website